🛢️ Everyone's stuck. Except Iran.

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Fighting between the U.S. and Iran has snarled shipping through the Strait of Hormuz this week. Everyone's stuck in traffic.

Everyone except Iran.

Here's the cheeky part: Iran struck vessels using the U.S.-backed route along Oman's coast. Meanwhile, over a third of the 101 ships that transited the strait in the past three days hugged the Iranian coastline instead.

Iran shut the motorway, then opened a toll road past its own front door.

And business is booming. More than 34M barrels of Iranian crude have sailed through Hormuz since the U.S. lifted its blockade on June 18.

That blockade had choked off basically all Iranian oil exports for two months. Now the stranded barrels are flooding out, heading to storage near customers like China.

Even Japan is playing along. 22 Japan-linked vessels, including six big crude tankers, exited the strait this week. Reportedly via the Iranian-backed lane.

When in Rome... sail past Iran.

So where do things stand?

Trump confirmed the U.S. will keep talking to Iran, but said the ceasefire is over. Bit of a mixed signal, that.

The U.S. wants Iran to publicly declare all Hormuz channels open and promise not to attack civilian ships. Iran, meanwhile, is blaming its recent ship attacks on "rogue elements" of the Revolutionary Guards.

Ah yes. The rogue elements. Classic.

The market's take: Oil ticked lower Friday, but analysts say there's still a chunky risk premium baked in, with Hormuz transits near a standstill and no reopening timeline in sight.

Friday's scoreboard:

For the week though? Crude still won big. WTI up 3.9%, Brent up 5.4%, while natgas dropped 8%.

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Berkshire Hathaway is now sitting on $397B in cash. A record.

That's not a rainy day fund. That's a "buy the rain" fund.

How big is it really? According to Barchart, Berkshire could theoretically acquire 474 of the 500 companies in the S&P 500 outright.

Imagine walking into a supermarket and being able to buy... the supermarket. And the chain. And most of their competitors.

So what's Buffett actually doing with it?

Not much buying, mostly selling. Berkshire dumped 15+ stock positions in Q1.

The new additions? A small but interesting shopping list:

Google, planes, and department stores. One of these is not like the others.

Here's the awkward part.

While the AI rally sends everything else to the moon, Berkshire stock is doing its best impression of a wallflower at a party.

Shares closed Friday near $493.29, down almost 3% on the week and 1.74% for the year.

The S&P 500? Up 10.20% YTD.

So the man with the biggest pile of dry powder in market history is... underperforming the index. Strange? Maybe.

Or maybe Buffett's seen this movie before. When the world's most famous investor hoards cash instead of chasing the rally, it's worth asking what he's waiting for.

Spoiler: he's usually not waiting for prices to go higher.

The most boring portfolio in finance just embarrassed everyone.

Bank of America says the "25/25/25/25" strategy is having its best run in years.

The setup? Split your money four ways: 25% US stocks, 25% bonds, 25% commodities, 25% cash.

That's it. No genius stock picks. No YOLO options plays.

And it's returning roughly 16% annualized this year. Best performance since 2021.

Why does this matter?

Because the market has been carried by a tiny gang of mega-cap names for ages. It's like a football team where one striker scores every goal and the rest just stand there.

The 25/25/25/25 portfolio doesn't care about the striker. It bets on the whole squad.

What's actually driving it:

Money is spreading out beyond the usual suspects.

And the next rotation?

BofA's strategists are eyeing consumer stocks as the potential next leg, as leadership keeps hopping between sectors.

The lesson here isn't sexy, but it's profitable: diversification still works, even when the headlines say only seven stocks matter.

Sometimes the tortoise wins. And this year, the tortoise is up 16%.